Let go

Last week during one of my regular 6am yoga classes, the room felt hotter than I thought comfortable. The weather has been so unpredictable lately and the morning air seemed cooler than was usual for this time of year. I let it pass, thinking I would not notice once I had warmed up and begun to flow.

As we began to move, I felt enthusiastic and energetic. I could feel my strength beginning to return after months of injury. Through this, I have learnt to listen to my body. This meant modifying most of my practice for the past six months and leaving out more complicated or advanced poses that I would normally relish in.

For the first time in what seemed like forever, I felt less restricted and more mobile. My experimentation gave me a renewed sense of certainty.

However, the heat seemed to really bother me. I was reminded of Bikram days when it was all I could do to breathe through the intensity to make it to the end of class. But this was not Bikram. Power shouldn’t be this hot. No, it was too hot. Or at least it felt that way to me.

I tried to breathe. As we moved upright from Crowe pose to standing I could feel my head become light and fuzzy - the effects of standing up too quickly. The room seemed to close in around me. Nonetheless, I took hold of my breath and thought of nothing else for fear of passing out. This wasn’t likeIy to happen but it was a possibility and I might need to rest in Child’s pose.

There is no shame in Child’s pose or resting - but I was having such a great class, I didn’t want to stop.

Ego. It was my ego that would not let me rest. Instead, I chose to reduce my practice from there on in.

Interestingly, my standing poses were held with grace and ease. Perhaps consciously letting go of pushing myself to a place where I wanted to be and allowing my body to just be exactly where it needed created this grace and ease. And in doing so I achieved my perfect pose at that very moment.

Let go. Take a deep breath, focus, and just be.